Swirling emotions.

BY CHRISTINE VEE

Christine is twenty-something coffee-and-vibes enthusiast who comes alive sitting across women, hearing their stories and journeying with them towards health and self-discovery. She firmly believes in the beauty of process, community and finding true belonging. When she’s not writing, engaging creativity or coaching women, you’ll probably find Christine geeking out over her plants or snuggled in a corner reading or listening to personal development podcasts. Connect with Christine over on her Instagram or website!

Hello, my name is the Queen of all emotions. 

I know them all – intimately, even. I’ll spell them out for you, follow the trail of breadcrumbs, and show you how I experience them within the span of half a day.

…Do you relate? You might even be in the seat right beside me on the roller coaster of ups and downs. That’s totally okay too.

I’m a feeler. And I don’t know about you, but I love it. 

I love the self-awareness emotions have forced me to cultivate. I’m proud to give language to swirly emotions and turn them into articulated words. Emotions brought into the light carry less weight once spoken aloud. 

And God created us with emotions. We shouldn’t discredit this fact.

The ability to understand and have compassion for your big, swirly emotions is a huge marker of maturity and health. It’s a gift.

But, if you frequent the roller coaster, you know it can be a love-hate relationship at times.

Downhills are no fun when you’re not prepared for them or feel sideswiped. You might have even learned your triggers and can usually stop the spiral before it happens. But sometimes, emotions can come out of nowhere, and we feel ill-equipped to handle our human heart.

The question here, then, is this: how do we remain grounded and rooted in Truth even when our emotions are bouncing all around inside us?

It’s not a matter of if, but when. Do you know how to stop playing defense and being a victim to your circumstances…?  It’s ok. I didn’t either. (I’m totally still learning).

Here are three questions to continually ask yourself:

1.   What voice is the loudest?

2.   Which voice am I learning?

3.   Who else am I letting in?

Knowing the answer to these questions are weapons to keep fighting for joy.

Let’s dig a little deeper:

What voice is the loudest?

Examine your self-talk. What does it sound like? Is it critical and mean-spirited, or kind and comforting? (For me, if left unchecked, it’s my worst enemy. I do this exercise often to readjust.)

It’s our responsibility to take control of the narrative flashing through our heads on superspeed (2 Corinthians 10:5). We were given the ability to disagree with thoughts. 

Hear me: not every single thought gets to or should have free reign to wreak havoc in our brains.

You’re allowed to say, “Nope, not today. You stop here.”

When the roller coaster does happen - lean in and listen: what does your voice sound like? What’s the loudest thought? 

No judgment – just curiosity.

Which voice am I intentionally learning?

We need to first clarify which voice is the loudest in order to actively change it.

The voice you’re intentionally learning is the voice you want your self-talk to sound like. It’s the voice that you spend the most time listening to (for a lot of us, it’s social media). 

Which voice are your listening to – and ultimately learning?

For me, as a person of faith, I want it to be God’s voice. How do I actively learn His voice, then? By reading His words (Proverbs 3:1-2). By absorbing them. By sitting with Him and letting His truth saturate every critical thought I have of myself. 

Imagine someone shouted your name behind you and you couldn’t turn around to see who it was. How would you know who shouted for you? 

We don’t just magically know how to differentiate strangers’ voices. We know the voices of those we spend the most time with. That’s how we identify who shouts our name.

God’s voice is no different. This is a journey, no doubt. It’s a lifelong process, and there’s so much grace. Which brings me to my last point:

Who else am I letting in?

Vulnerability is scary, sure. But in my opinion: isolation is even scarier.

We were not created to live life alone. Period. We flourish in community. Alongside people. But when we isolate, perhaps unintentionally — we become our only lifeboat. 

When you’re alone, your voice is the only one around. You’re on an island, and it all rests on you.

…You don’t have a fighting chance if you’re in need of some help.

And you will need help. It’s called being human – and there’s nothing wrong with it!

Look: Moses’ friends held his arms up while the Israelites fought because he grew tired and couldn’t keep ‘em up anymore (Exodus 17:12). Because of this, the Israelites won the battle. 

The same goes for us.

Whose voice are you letting in? Who are you allowing to hold your hands up when you can’t anymore? Are you your only lifeboat?

Tell me below – what’s your next step? Swirly emotions require intentional action. No more hiding up in your brain. Speak it out, learn the language of love, and do life together.

I hope you give yourself a fighting chance.